Piles of smack, because I'm worth it!

Over the last week or so I've been a little concerned - not just about losing things-  as my vision has been a little blurred by the middle of the afternoon.  I've been thinking that perhaps it was adjusting to my new varifocals.  I've had new frames and they are deeper than the current narrow specs in vogue, so my vision should be more balanced, but  for the sudden blurriness they have been very comfortable.

Both today and yesterday Ive also noticed that my eyes have taken on the Panda effect. My kohl eyeliner has seeped to the under part of my eyes, making my saggy bags look much more prominent looking like I've just had a good cry! Not the look I was going for at all. I have taken a little more care applying some smack in the mornings ( oops by that I mean SLAP! LOL - the only things I'm addicted to is chocolate and my kids!) 

As the new specs have a non-reflective coating, the benefit is that I have not had any 

trouble with the glare from the 47 halogen type lights  beaming into my eyes at our Reception desk at work. The downside is that my eyes are now visible and I've tried to apply the  aforementioned SMACK/SLAP with more care. I have a sallow complexion so I do have dark circles under my eyes compounded by the crinkly wrinklies which I swear appeared around my 47th birthday! 

I'm telling you all this and I apologise if it is very tedious, shallow and so far lacking in its point, but what I'm breaking to you gently is, that in my enthusiasm to masque my flaws by grouting and filling, I made one small but very vital error, I think I used too much. 

WHAT went wrong?   Well, my wrinkle cream whilst successfully tightening and smoothing out the skin under my eyes, during the course of the day it all well ... melted! Yes my smack/slap melted and it upped and ran under  and very  crucially into my eyes, causing the vision to be blurred. 

WHY and  HOW?  Well, I applied too much of this greasy magic lotion, in fact you could say I piled it on. I did this purposefully as this product is reknowed to shrink and soothe.

Its name ...?

Preparation H.  Less is more FFF, next time I shall use it in miniscule quantity!

I really NEED to find those bloody sunglasses....

I remembered that I had forgotton

... my debit card and lost my sunglasses, my itrip, my mobile phone, and one new shoe! All this is typical of one week in my mad, sad world!

In my last post I mentioned that I had left my debit card in the payment machine of TK Maxx after buying some bargain shoes, but that wasn't the whole story, not even a bit of it!

When I got home from town, long before I remembered that I had forgotten my card, I noticed that I had only one shoe from the pair I had just bought, TK Maxx discourages the use of carrier bags so I dropped them into my handbag. My bags are always large enough to carry around extra items like a pair of shoes, ironing board and the kitchen sink.

I checked the car, the driveway and I mentally retraced my steps but was at a loss to recall where the shoe might be. This is a pattern that I have to admit is being repeated not just occasionally but repeatedly with different items, several times a week. In the last week I have misplaced my mobile, which I had to report to police and I have had blocked; I cannot find my itrip which enables me to listen to my ipod in the car through the radio - don't ask me how it just does; I have left my prescription sunglasses somewhere, I know not where, I need them for driving as I hate the glare AND they make me feel fab and mysterious and I can hide behind them without eye makeup, so that's a double blow.

These lost items usually come to light after a few days or weeks. On the way over to Gateshead on wednesday my daughter mentioned that it was a shame I couldn't find my itrip, as she had her nano with her and we could have had a singalong to some show tunes. She started to look in the cubby holes as if she didn't believe me and there it was, in plain view, even though I had looked in the car numerous times! I heard her mimic me by saying, ' I suppose you were looking with your nose again!'

I found my mobile phone between the sliding back doors of the car, again I had looked there several times, but not effectively enough obviously!

After I collected my debit card from the nice lady in TK Maxx, who I swear was smirking to herself, a bit like the nice lady in the post office who saves my p/office card for me as she now knows I'll walk off without it,  just like the elderly ladies in their eighties collecting their pensions! I then went into the sweet shop opposite, which I remembered was last place I visited on wednesday for our sweetie provisions for the drive over to the Sage. I spoke, with not a little embarrassment to the owner who smiled knowingly and asked his assistant to 'Pass the lady the shoe which she left on the counter last evening.'

I thanked him profusely and left the shop with a very pink face, as

he called out to me, ' Take care now and be home before midnight Cinderella!'

My sunglasses are still missing!

Post of the day at Authorblog, thank you  David!!!