THE BIG 50!!

Well it has finally happened and l am still here, I am still alive, and I am all in one piece!


The world as l know it hasn't ended, aliens haven't landed or if they have l haven't noticed!


My hair didn't turn white overnight, my waist line hasn't disappeared, well not totally!



l didn't wake up to find myself wearing a nylon frilly nightdress that resembled my great Aunt Margaret's, a hair net, incontinent pants nor bed socks and liver spots haven't appeared on my hands or anywhere else for that matter!




All my faculties are still intact and in good working order. the wheels are all well oiled and the white matter is still clunking away!


I still fancy the pants off Pierce Brosnan, Hugh Jackman and Gerard Butler in any order, l'm not fussy, but if you push me Gerry's my man!

I spent last Monday evening out with the girls; 20 friends, family and work colleagues, we had fun a few drinks, good food and in great company, what more could a girl ask for?

On Wednesday the kids and I drove down to Southampton to catch the car ferry to the Isle of Wight for a break. When l woke up on Saturday morning, my kids presented me with birthday gifts, cards and chocs they had kept hidden from me all the way down. Surprisingly the chocolate didn't melt in the heat of the car boot! And l even have some left!

We enjoyed a leisurely breakfast outside the trailer in sunshine and then we packed up and drove off to Kent to visit with my folks for the weekend.

I was spoiled by my kids, friends and family and so haven't experienced any of the expected after shocks!

Although it is a little bit surreal, l must confess seeing a room full of pink cards, festooned with images of handbags, cakes and chocolates (do they all know me or not!) and large silver 5o's all ove rthe show! I have to keep saying to myself this is me!! And it doesnt feel like it, not one bit ... I don't know what I was afraid off!

It is just a number ... for heavens sake just get on with it girl and smell the roses! AHhhhhh!!!

We're off on a road trip ...

Oh bugger it! I just realised that I saved this post to draft instead of publishing it before we left last tuesday... here's what I wrote!

We're all packed, the car is stuffed to overflowing and my sister in law is here to dog and house sit, in that order!

We each have our own bag full of road trip basics, foamy fruits, wine gums, bananas, assorted sarnies and raspberry muffins, to be eaten in any order in the first two hours, then everyone will be high on sugar and then we'll hit a low 5 hours before we arrive.

We will be staying in a vintage AirstreamTrailer, known as a silver bullet, courtesy of Vintage Vacations uk and then we will explore the island and have some fun.

Hopefully we will relax sometime too, as have some great books packed, including Rushdie's Midnights' Children, l'm determined to master the Booker master, and a favourite author of mine is Joyce Carol Oates, her latest paperback, The Gravediggers Daughter and the latest hyped book, The Private Lives of Pippa Lee by Rebecca Miller, which is a Richard and Judy Summer Read choice. It has some literary creedence apparently, as the author is the daughter of playwright Arthur Miller, (and is the wife of Daniel Day Lewis why that's of any import, who knows!)

I will also turn 50 while we're away! So when l come back l shall know how it feels.

See ya soon!

Reasons to value women over 50!

I found this on the net and thought it appropriate and funny enough to share! (though I can't say I'm this confident!)

"As I grow in age, I value women who are over 50 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

A woman over 50 will not lay next to you in bed and ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.

If a woman over 50 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's usually something more interesting.

A woman over 50 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 50 give a darn what you might think about her or what she's doing.

Women over 50 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.

A woman over 50 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn't trust the guy with other women.

Women over 50 couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won't betray her.

Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 50. They always know.

A woman over 50 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women or drag queens.

Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 50 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.
Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over 50 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coifed hot woman of 50+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 18-year-old waitress.

For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free," here's an update for you: Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage."

SO WHAT'S IT ALL ABOUT?

Did l really call this blog 'Fat, frumpy & fifty?' Yes, I did and why? Well because I was thinking of a suitable title for this blog, one that summed up my 'NOW' and rightly or wrongly that's how I feel NOW. l remembered my mum using the phrase often to describe herself and other women of a certain age. And low and behold I realise that now includes me!

Am I fat, frumpy & fifty? I guess l'm overweight a tad or two, but then who isn't? Am I frumpy? truthfully? yeah on a BAD day or when l'm just slouching around the house and garden, no makeup, just jeans and a tee. AM I fifty? Ah, now here we come to it, the crux of the matter.

I will reach this monumental state next month. Sigh! I'm all a twitter and I can hardly stop thinking about it!

However, l have decided not to sit and squirm and squeeze this offending spot on my immediate horizon, I have decided that this will be a great year, the year I start to put myself a little more ahead in the queue of wants and needs. Perhaps to pamper, to indulge and perhaps to enjoy!

I haven't a plan but I'm sure it will come together nicely over the next weeks and months and l shall try and stick to it, this plan I don't have!