The decks are cleared, the pine needles are all vacuumed up (well almost all) the nativity carefully wrapped and stored, the baubles and tinsel are boxed. Presents are now all placed in their appropriate owners quarters. The snow that lurked unusually long here, is melting. The roads that were thick sheets of transparent ice have turned into a slate slush. The -19' temperature is now only a memory. I hope. I've thrown out the last of the cake, mince pies and Stollen, as I was the only one eating it. The waste pains me but as I must have eaten my body weight in cake, this mustn't go on.
I'm not a fan of New Year resolutions because l can't hack the pressure. I know it's self serving but it's not worth it unless it is a positive pressure. Instead I resolve to build upon the last couple of years' progress, to be a calmer, kinder, more compassionate and a better tempered person. To achieve this goal, I decided that instead of running myself ragged and mentally jagged and trying to people please my way out of the paper bag that is my world, l had to start being good to myself. First and foremost. Yes l know it's been said by many, over and over, but until it dawns on you as a kind of original thought of your own. You can't own it, nor live it.
So to start the new year off with good news; I got the job I was interviewed for just before Christmas. Which really means that I carry on doing the job at the Museum, but now I have tenure; a permanent contract. Great!
I am now officially a heffalump and if I say so out loud, here it may even push me back to yoga and pilates sometime soon! I have booked myself a ticket to see Rufus Wainwright in April at the Sage and to see Rodders (Stewart) in May at the Metro Arena. I have pencilled out time for Kent trips to the folks and a potential return to the Isle of Wight with the kids in July. I will try to repeat my recent London trip around May time, so I might be able to sit in the parks and gardens and spend more time languorously people watching. There is a fab Exhibition due at the V&A Costume Room, so that is a must see also.
Painting, writing, reading and thinking. All must do's. I won't mention my work, housework, chauffeuring, cooking and all. That's all a given. In the spirit of this post's title, this is my plan and you never know everything else may just magically follow!
Love Thyself
Who will speak words of love to you, if you do not speak them to yourself?
Arise every morning and give thanks to the Power for your life,
your awareness, your creativity, and all that you hold dear.
Then speak words of love to yourself.
As you love yourself more and more,
the fountain within will flow more readily and persistently,
until it overflows the bricks and mortar of your heart-well
and brings forth life in all the corners of your garden.
You are beautiful.
You are unique.
You are my wonderful creation.
Love yourself each day before the pink dawn has lost its blush.
Love yourself as the noonday sun purifies the heavens.
Love yourself in the velvet shawl of twilight.
Repeat these words to yourself:
"I love you more than anyone in the world.
You are an infinite, immortal being.
You know only abundance.
You are the most wondrous creature in the world to me.
You are divinely beautiful.
You are wonderful and magical and you have the gift of Love."
Then will the sparrows and swans
drink from your hand, praising your kindness.
The forest will be cooled by your generous waters.
Your name will be a blessing on the lips of all who thirst.
Anon.
Love thyself most and best
Love thyself day and night
Let no feared word cause thee
To hate thyself
Love thyself last and first
Love thyself more each month
Let no scared howl cause thee
To doubt thyself
Love thyself more and more
Love thyself loud and long
Let no bad dream make thee
Mistrust thyself
Thyself is all you'll have
From cradle to thy grave
Love yours enough to make
Us love ourselves.
the words of Woodie Guthrie
