Monday, 27 December 2010

thwarted

there are so many silences..

all are a deafness
that defies all words,

moments chosen,
friendships thwarted,
a need to control
the unknown

I chose silence,
but the white noise
resents my reasoning,

fear and self loathing
take over the lease,
as we run from our shadows
and cleave pathways
in the wilderness,
hacking away at distrust
that is only mine,

fear must be owned
l can do that
but will I
trust me again

will you

8 comments:

  1. You SO need to do your book of poetry - and to meet my friend the poet...glad your xmas was better than expected Onwards and upwards. Lx

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  2. Sara
    the good thing about not trusting
    is ya can't get burned.
    it's safe-like a storm shelter
    but then,
    you never get to see a storm in all it's glory amd fury
    my guess is you've seen enough storms. I think you're maybe wise to choose the shelter
    ~rick

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  3. Hey, if you trust you, then I trust you, and if I trust you, you can be trusted (I think.) In any case, here's hoping all is well, or, if not, soon will be. *HUG*

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  4. You must be kind and gracious to yourself. Allow yourself the reality of failure. Trust yourself again and again because you need the confidence to find your way. We all want to regain trust of the ones we love when we have lost theirs. Allow yourself that.

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  5. You must have courage, my friend.

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  6. Here's wishing that 2011 will be a year of fewer tears shed, of fewer hearts broken, of stronger will, and happiness deserved. For so many of us!
    You, dear, are healing tremendously. Remember when you used to Fat, Frumpy, and Fifty? 'Nuff said.

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  7. It's funny, I clicked over here today on the Michael Buble and I read the lines and I thought to myself, not feeling the lines today, that yes, it is a truth but only when you feel as though there is a measure of control. (As I am quite out of control of my life in this moment.) And then I back-read this post and you write, "a need to control the unknown." I'm thinking that perhaps it adds up that when it is that we are absolutely out of control that we feel most lost, most defeated. And then I wonder at my own discovery as I know, ultimately know that we are never in control.

    And so I wonder why I don't feel this song today, this optimism? All of the variables are there and yet I don't. I feel no degree of control.

    Funny how this is. Just trying to figure things out.

    For you, how will you trust you again? How do we trust in anything? I'm not sure of the answer. Perhaps it is just with time that we are assuaged.

    xo
    erin

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Take the weight of your feet, draw up a chair and pour yourself a cuppa. Leave your troubles at the door and together we shall ride out the storms.
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Saz x