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What am I?

In an art gallery the other day, a canvas hung with text listing the roles in one persons life. Entitled. What am I? As opposed to, who am I?

I always wonder about that. Am I what l feel l am? What l think l am? Or what people perceive me to be? I believe l am all these things and more, much more. I'm not sure if l even wish to be defined. I certainly do not need to be. I know l am ever changing, never the same, inconsistent yet consistently true to myself.

Is it perception or reality? I feel there must be a constant, as it is innate. A shadow of love and life that connects to the family and friends way beyond any tag l could be given, any box into which l am placed.

I have had many roles, as myself and as other see me;in the workplace, in the home, friendships. I have always been in a front line... more by luck than judgement but there you are..

school girl, checkout girl, shampooist,
 hairdresser, shop girl
manager, area manager, fashion buyer
fundraiser, trainer, counselor
bookseller, market researcher,
school helper, charity worker.
dinner lady, volunteer, fundraiser,
gallery assistant, sales advisor
receptionist, exhibition installer,
student, reader, writer,
artist, blogger, book reviewer, museum worker,
art gallery assistant, receptionist,
friend, mother, wife, daughter...

would any define me... .the last four have the most value for me


  1. Labels may get stuck on the outside of the jar, but the contents remain the creation of the creator!

  2. I am often amazed how people judge what you are by what you do and as we all know they can be poles apart.

  3. I think that sums up what most women are...
    multi taskers who can take on a challenge and work miracles.
    My best roles have been wife and mother and now grandmother...they seem to be the most rewarding.

  4. All that you do
    All that you know
    All that you feel
    Is all that you are.
    An island, a haven, a sanctuary
    a safe harbour.
    You are unique, a one off.
    You are YOU.

  5. Isn't it funny how what we have done defines us, and yet what else could? Wife is on my list, but it was me diminished, trying to become so small I would fit what he needed until I disappeared... Never want to be a wife again.

  6. The value to you is where it's at, Saz. Others see your outer self, but only you can know the inner, right? I am reminded of what I consider to be Mark Twain's greatest piece of writing, one that relatively few know. It is the preface to his autobiography, from which the following quote is taken:

    "Life does not consist mainly – or even largely – of facts and happenings. It consists mainly of the storm of thoughts that is forever blowing through one's head."

  7. Love your blog. Mind checking out mine?

  8. I would say that you are a multi talented, sensitive and artistic & creative person!
    Maggie X

    Nuts in May

  9. still trying to figure this all out..Maybe by my next birthday, I’ll be a grown-up...who knows? I kind of doubt it.

  10. Saz, this is the question, or at least one of the questions, that I ask of myself a great deal now, seeing that I have been in flux. Recognizing that, I suppose, that we are always in flux, that we are never one thing defined. Accepting that. And even in this moment, depending on how you ask me, or how I feel, or who is looking, I am many things. It is to open the chest and let down the hands and say, it is ok for me to be here, like a breath, not as a thing - this is where I am right now. It is not easy. And it is easily judged. But who am I to work for positive judgement from others? What would that even mean? Nothing to me. I'd be a shell. And so I open, face to the wind, and hummmmmm.

    You, me, we - are on our way.


  11. You are complex and beautiful...a multiplicity of talents, heart and relationships...You create and recreate...and bring joy and exquisite beauty to everything and everyone you touch. I love and admire you. And I am honored to be your friend. You treasure all that matters most. Have a weekend as beautiful as you are, dearest Saz! Love always, Janine XO

  12. I think you missed a few - Beauty, philosopher, thinker, gardener, photographer, creative, vintage costume expert, ace driver, cineaste, navigator, counsellor, adviser, and there's more I know I've missed... I do think the most important one to me is friend and one who cares... Defo. Need to respond to your e-mail, sorry I have not replied just yet. My love to you as always and hope you have enjoyed your garden refuge this week. Fhi xxx

  13. You are all those and more .. and I am so glad to know all of you!

  14. Isn't that the eternal question? We might get closer to an answer from time to time but it'll always be an illusive goal

  15. A new look! Love it!! Especially the peacock feathers, I've never subscribed to the view that they are unlucky and decorated my dining room with them once.

    Just been catching up on your last few posts - how lovely to see that bloke playing guitar on the staircase. And £10 a month is definitely worth it for that garden - how fantastic you found found out how to get access and they let you. What a great idea, then the garden is kept beautiful for people who appreciate it. (Still meaning to blog about the garden near me, maybe in the Summer Hols)

  16. What a thoughtful question you pose. I'd love to have seen that canvas myself. What a cool idea for a painting.

  17. The more I read the more the old Degarte thing comes to mind. See previous post. smashing little blog.

  18. It's an odd thing, is it not? to define oneself by the tasks one has done to earn money to do the things we like. And yet we do it all the time (except the wife, mother friend labels).

    I wonder why this is? Do we need to peg our place in society? prove we have a place there? Very odd when you think about it.

  19. This reminds me of all the blog profiles I've read that start off with the blogger listing their "labels". It makes me wonder the same things you do.

    Interesting post.

    Happy weekend, jj

  20. You sound pretty amazing to me!

  21. where on earth do you begin to write the list?? as others have indicated different facets of 'you' are seen by others...

    btw Saz, I have responded to the comment you made on my blog


  22. i do so vastly prefer the question of WHO you are rather than WHAT you are. the who is vastly more intimate and interesting. the what is just the dressing.

  23. Great list, and so it goes on...



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Thanks for stopping by!

Take the weight of your feet, draw up a chair and pour yourself a cuppa. Leave your troubles at the door and together we shall ride out the storms.
I will walk a while in your shoes...

Saz x

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